Focus

In an age of multitasking, and multimedia streaming in from every direction at many megabytes per second, it is sometimes hard to remember what is important.

Not just important in the broad sense of the word, but what centers and grounds your very own soul personally.

There are a few exercises that bring me to a happy grounded place and refocus me. They have been my own since I was a kid.... "what if" is a favourite. It's a game me and my sister invented on our many hours commuting between parents, and I think it kept us pretty sharp (if I do say so myself). What you do is say thing like "what someone gave me $1 million?" And come up with ANY answer you want. There is no wrong answer and it can change every time you play. Then there is the more challenging questions like "what if I lost my eyesight?", "what if there was an earthquake and power was off for days", "what if I was suddenly alone?" These last questions are more challenging, but I think they are just as revealing to our focus. Somehow by going through the exercise I feel less afraid of such a thing. It helps me be thankful for my here and now in a very powerful way.

Across the street, the family of my lost neighbour gather and deal with the aftermath of a "what if" that no one wants to realize. But I saw in the paper today the obituary -- and it was beautiful! It was a detailed, shining tribute to a vibrant couple, it sounded more like a celebration of their achievements in life than a disparaging of their loss. I respect that. They (even in their grief) have found a positive focal point.

For the record, this Thanksgiving will be a genuine time of thanks for me. I am preparing a feast for my extended family, with all the trimmings, and all the love I can give them.

I will also be taking some time just for me this weekend with another centering exercise that I really enjoy. Sitting down with a pencil and some graph paper drawing houseplans. I love building the imaginary rooms and walking the halls in my mind. Sometimes it is a mansion - dream home with no restrictions, sometimes it is a garden gazebo/screened-in retreat with a hammock inside. (Lately I have been particularly attracted to traditional Japanese construction styles. The proportions and quality and use of light and shape so carefully calculated....) It sounds selfish, but after I've had a chance to draw some houses for a while, I feel so much better equipped to deal with the little things, and more pleasant with those around me. I have done this since I was in grade 4 (that I can remember), it works for me so I'm not going to fight it.