For a change of pace, we went to an ocean site. You would be surprised how few and far between the undeveloped ocean recreation sites are! But we did our research and found a site a couple hours (plus) North of our town on the Discovery Passage. Instead of posting tonnes of pictures (it was a beautiful place) I will post the permalink to my new shutter fly book that I just made up for it!
Here it is!
The days were lovely and warm enough in the sun, the evenings were breezy and cool (keeping the trailer fresh even with 4 unwashed bodies in there). We enjoyed a waterfront spot all private and clean. The water was sparkling (though much too cold for me) and the sea life was really active with sockeye jumping right out in front of us (no fishing gear though!) and even a pod of orcas within sight.
We were way out there. Long, treacherous road up and down to get to the site. The bush was closed to logging because of the dryness, so there was NO traffic with the logging trucks not running, that made it very quiet on land. On the water, it's a busy shipping lane with boats of every shape and size going by all day and night. Tugs, log booms, cargo ships, cruise ships (HUGE), pleasure craft, many kinds of fish boats, sailing, military, and wickedly fast whale watchers.
The water was silky smooth so kayaking was marvellous. Even more interesting sights to see out on the water than on shore. And there was no shortage of interesting beach combing!
The only downside was there was so much interesting stuff that I got barely any reading done LOL.
Have a look at the link, the photos say so much.
9.08.2014
8.05.2014
Slow Projects
Renovations can be tackled 2 ways:
1) Pay through the nose and hire a professional to get it done completely and quickly.
2) Do it on your own, when you have the time and when you have the money.
Obviously, with my frugal personality, I have generally chosen Option B. And that's why, after 2 years in this house, the baseboard trim and window casings and interior doors are still not painted. We managed to paint the exterior of our home last summer (JUST before the rain came back) but the exterior trim was left as the peeling, faded brown until we could get back around to it.
Inside, I'd finally had enough of looking at the old, dark door casings, so I have primed them at last! It looks like streaky primer, but already so much brighter! You would be amazed how much nicotine leeched through the primer (its a good thing I invested in the stain-blocking "kilz" primer).
Also, very exciting, the double french doors between the front room and the kitchen are now painted! It was fiddly and stressful painting all the little ridges and grooves around the 30 glass panels, but worth it to have the glorious feeling of FINALLY removing the glass-protecting plastic! Hooray! Bright and actually finished looking!
I guess my inside work inspired some outside work too, hubby hired our teen to scrape and wash the exterior facia and posts. Then we went out and scored a big bucket of professional quality exterior paint that was a miss-tint and close enough to the colour that we wanted that we couldn't pass up the great price! (FRUGAL HINT: Always check the miss-tint section before buying paint. Much less expensive, and often I find an upgrade in paint quality too.)
It's miserably hot weather for painting, but it's the perfect dry humidity for good adhesion, so out we go, and it's looking SO much better! We are doing one side of the house at a time... front first :)
Whomever painted the trim last time was very sloppy. Drips below and dabs up in the soffit. I never know what to do about that. I painted carefully and straight and but then there is the ugly brown still there in blobs and smudges. Maybe I have to find some white metal paint for the soffits, but I suspect that would open up a whole host more work! So I will try to live with it for a while.
All in all, the progress feels great. With every brush stroke the house looks more finished. It makes me wonder why I waited so long to do it. Oh ya, I hate sanding! (shiver) the sensation is so very 'abrasive' on my nerves. Thats why I'm doing the non-sanding areas first LOL.
On a different note, the garden is a wild jungle of yummy veggies! Seriously overgrown and challenging to harvest, with excellent yields. Everyone who comes to visit gets a complimentary zucchini and some fresh beans to snack on while they visit. :)
1) Pay through the nose and hire a professional to get it done completely and quickly.
2) Do it on your own, when you have the time and when you have the money.
Obviously, with my frugal personality, I have generally chosen Option B. And that's why, after 2 years in this house, the baseboard trim and window casings and interior doors are still not painted. We managed to paint the exterior of our home last summer (JUST before the rain came back) but the exterior trim was left as the peeling, faded brown until we could get back around to it.
Inside, I'd finally had enough of looking at the old, dark door casings, so I have primed them at last! It looks like streaky primer, but already so much brighter! You would be amazed how much nicotine leeched through the primer (its a good thing I invested in the stain-blocking "kilz" primer).
Also, very exciting, the double french doors between the front room and the kitchen are now painted! It was fiddly and stressful painting all the little ridges and grooves around the 30 glass panels, but worth it to have the glorious feeling of FINALLY removing the glass-protecting plastic! Hooray! Bright and actually finished looking!
I guess my inside work inspired some outside work too, hubby hired our teen to scrape and wash the exterior facia and posts. Then we went out and scored a big bucket of professional quality exterior paint that was a miss-tint and close enough to the colour that we wanted that we couldn't pass up the great price! (FRUGAL HINT: Always check the miss-tint section before buying paint. Much less expensive, and often I find an upgrade in paint quality too.)
It's miserably hot weather for painting, but it's the perfect dry humidity for good adhesion, so out we go, and it's looking SO much better! We are doing one side of the house at a time... front first :)
Whomever painted the trim last time was very sloppy. Drips below and dabs up in the soffit. I never know what to do about that. I painted carefully and straight and but then there is the ugly brown still there in blobs and smudges. Maybe I have to find some white metal paint for the soffits, but I suspect that would open up a whole host more work! So I will try to live with it for a while.
All in all, the progress feels great. With every brush stroke the house looks more finished. It makes me wonder why I waited so long to do it. Oh ya, I hate sanding! (shiver) the sensation is so very 'abrasive' on my nerves. Thats why I'm doing the non-sanding areas first LOL.
On a different note, the garden is a wild jungle of yummy veggies! Seriously overgrown and challenging to harvest, with excellent yields. Everyone who comes to visit gets a complimentary zucchini and some fresh beans to snack on while they visit. :)
8.04.2014
Cluck Cluck Cluckity Cluck Cluck
(translation: "Nice to meet you")
My sister in law is moving (the house they were renting sold out from under them) and the selection in their town is VERY limited. The only place that was even close to what they need allows NO PETS OF ANY KIND. A sad day for the 3 kids as they are scrambling to find homes for the cat, dog and 17 hens, a rooster and 4 new chicks.
Since a few of our hens are mostly past laying age, we said we would adopt a few of theirs. The stopped by last night with 4 large hens and a tiny bantam hen. Well that puts us WAAAAAY over our coop's limit, so I posted on-line for 3 free hens. The response was incredible! We chose a casual hobby farm just outside of town. They have 30+ chickens of all shapes and sizes, ducks, geese, turkeys, goats and even a couple piglets! She said she doesn't mind keeping old hens because she gets more than enough eggs and they have work to do clearing her field for a future veggie garden and keeping pest off the apple trees. They are not only free range, all the different species are together as they please all over the lot. I brought our 3 least productive hens (made me a bit weepy since one of them is my favourite hen-friend (the bottom one on the picture), Cami was very sad packing them up too, but he ended up happy with the farm.
So we left them there. Angel, Penny (top left) and Stripes. We hope they are happy on their new farm.
The new-to-us chickens are still getting their bearings. They are all in their prime laying age, so they might actually be able to keep up with our appetite for eggs! One is downright feisty and instantly tried to assert dominance over the whole flock (bloody beaks and combs all over the place). But 18 hours later she seems to be calming down. I guess they need to figure out their pecking order, right?
Introducing the new members of the flock:
"Puffy Cheeks" soon to be re-named "Toast"
"Arwen" Ya, she's keeping that name!
"Stripe II" soon to be renamed "Oreo" (big bird upper left) and the little birdy to the right is actually an adult chicken named "Penny" or "Little Penny"
and this black, camera-shy one is "Lucy" but the kids want to rename her "Maleficient" because of her black feathers and her comb that looks slightly like horns
There you have it. I will miss our originals, but look forward to getting to know these new hens. I can already tell that Toast and Arwen will be sweeties.
7.05.2014
Time heals all wounds
The pain is less, now that some time is past.
Night is the most painful. I miss her mewing as she sneaks into Cameron's room as I read the bedtime story, which her leaping on the bed to knead and purr at us until she has enough and jumps away (with or with our a hiss and nip). She would always come back in the night and try to climb under his covers or sit on his chest and lick his nose or paw at his cheek (with an occasional claw to wake him up for a pet-session).
But every night gets slightly less expectant and sad, and every day gets slightly dulled to absence of her beautiful feline presence.
=======================
Despite her loss, my garden grows and each day holds something good. I am thankful.
Night is the most painful. I miss her mewing as she sneaks into Cameron's room as I read the bedtime story, which her leaping on the bed to knead and purr at us until she has enough and jumps away (with or with our a hiss and nip). She would always come back in the night and try to climb under his covers or sit on his chest and lick his nose or paw at his cheek (with an occasional claw to wake him up for a pet-session).
But every night gets slightly less expectant and sad, and every day gets slightly dulled to absence of her beautiful feline presence.
=======================
Despite her loss, my garden grows and each day holds something good. I am thankful.
I go out into the garden and tend my plants, pick the kale and zucchini, and fresh pea-pods and strawberries and raspberries and watch the bean vines reach for the sky and the sunflowers follow the sun and wait for the tomatoes to show their fruit. I collect the eggs from my happy hens and walk the dog and play with the kids (when they let me - teens) and spend as much time with my husband as he has available. All these things are the best things.
6.20.2014
Meow
My darling Jet (aka "murf", "fuzzy face", "pretty kitty", "fluffy pants") has met an untimely end.
She slipped out of the house at bedtime between the dog's legs the night of the 18th. It's not like her to stay out long before screeching at the door minutes later. She is an indoor cat and she knew it.
So now that it's the 20th and we still hadn't seen or heard her (she had been known to try to get in the crawlspace or get herself closed into closets many times, so we were listening for her at all the sheds, etc) We HOPED she got herself into someone else's house. I called the Animal Control Center with questions on how to go about finding a lost cat. They asked me where I live, and to describe the cat, then they dropped the bomb on me that a deceased cat had been recovered less than a block from our home. It took all my willpower to keep it together.
My oldest boy and I went to the Pound and identified her. At least it looks like it was quick. My fluffy puddy tat silly dumb girl. I am so very very sad. It could have been worse, it could have been way worse, and that is what I have to keep saying to myself. But I am in shock. My kids are in shock too.
Here is her history as far as I know it.
Found in a Vancouver dumpster in July 2001 with litter mates. Rescued by a family that had her spayed and named her "Jet" because of her Jet Li kung fu kitty moves. Their kids acquired a cat allergy so she was taken in my a friend who already had 2 cats. Then in 2006 after my darling furry gentlemen "Mo" had left us peacefully of old age, I was at a house party where Jet's owner was also attending. I was petting the hostess's cat saying how much I missed my cat, and the lady mentioned she had too many cats for her apartment agreement. She offered me Jet, and I fell in love with her beautiful photos. The next weekend Jet was brought over from the mainland to us. Immediately it was apparent that she was ..... temperamental..... downright nasty actually! But we forced her to accept our love and she loved the boys and myself (on her terms). Mostly her bad moods were taken out on the witless dog. All in good fun I think. So pretty, so soft, so snarly.
A love of cream cheese, and a flighty hilarious perpetual kitten playfulness too. Completely untrainable, but oh so kitty (if you have a cat you know what I mean). Not graceful thanks to a limp that she came to us with, but still elegant. I'm not sure she even could retract her racer sharp claws... but she didn't use them if you held her juuuuust right.
Oh Jet, I will miss you so much!
I hope you like the spot we picked for you under the trees. I hope that black cat you've been scrapping with through the window regrets luring you out that night.
5.19.2014
The long game
Going to the grocery store is so easy. Grab a basket, squeeze fruits and veg from all over the globe, any season of the year. But while that is an amazing perk of western society, it lends itself from a significant detachment between kitchens and the source of our food. There is no word to describe the sense of pride that comes from feeding friends and family vegetables that were coaxed from seeds in the bit of earth 20 feet from the kitchen table! It's a connectivity that is almost spiritual, even if it's just a few weeks of the year from a years worth of effort - it's worth it!
Last year I was conservative with my veggie garden. It was the first growing season in this place. I had to learn the light, the soil and most importantly the pests that I would have to share the harvest with!
This year I have the added bonus of my new-to-me greenhouse for seed starting this season too. Oh what a joy that is to have. It is downright lush in there!
Now that I feel a bit more confident in what this yard has to offer, the planting selection is in full swing.....
Zucchini; last year the fruit never matured and rotted before I got many fruit. This year is a new spot int the garden and waaaaaay more plants (from my greenhouse seedlings) to hopefully win by sheer numbers.
Beans; last year the green pole beans did very well here, so just a few more plants because I have the space.
Peas; some were wormy, very sad about that, but enough were good to put them in this year.
Potatoes; I didn't wait long enough last year so they were small but delicious! A few more mounds to play with this year.
Tomatoes; huge volume of green fruit last year, but a badly timed rain ruined most of them before they could ripen, It was tragic. This year when they come out of the greenhouse, I will make sure they have a cover somehow.
Onions; something ate the baby onions from the inside out, I don't know what, but I am trying again this year with red onions and leeks.
Swiss chard; I mixed them with lettuces and spinach last year, and that didn't work well for harvesting (but it was a pretty plant combo to look at) this year the chard has it's own space. As for lettuce and spinach, I will be container gardening these delicate greens this year.
Winter squash; last year was a complete flop. Rotten before they were the size of oranges. I won't be trying again this year.
Radishes and beets; they grew fast and plentiful, but where very riddled with holes. At least the beet greens were nice. I tried from seed this year, but only a few are sprouted so far.... Ah well.
Broccoli; it did well with tiny heads, but I just harvested and more came back. Packed full of rich flavour I am trying from seed this year, so far very wimpy little sprouts.
NEW for ths year;
Cucumbers: staying in the greenhouse.
Peppers: for the greenhouse.
Kale: started in the greenhouse and put ou last week, so far so good.
Bok choi: started from seeds, but when I set them out in the garden they bolted to flower immediately!
Sunflowers: looking good, they will be a treat for the chickens.
Melons: some seeds from a grocery store fruit, we will see if I get anything from the little sprouts I planted last week.
Figs: 2 new trees... Hopefully they will get enough sun for fruit.
I hope these very much loved baby plants reach their full potential in my garden.... If they fail, it won't be from lack of love on my part. I am loving the gardening this year.
Last year I was conservative with my veggie garden. It was the first growing season in this place. I had to learn the light, the soil and most importantly the pests that I would have to share the harvest with!
This year I have the added bonus of my new-to-me greenhouse for seed starting this season too. Oh what a joy that is to have. It is downright lush in there!
Now that I feel a bit more confident in what this yard has to offer, the planting selection is in full swing.....
Zucchini; last year the fruit never matured and rotted before I got many fruit. This year is a new spot int the garden and waaaaaay more plants (from my greenhouse seedlings) to hopefully win by sheer numbers.
Beans; last year the green pole beans did very well here, so just a few more plants because I have the space.
Peas; some were wormy, very sad about that, but enough were good to put them in this year.
Potatoes; I didn't wait long enough last year so they were small but delicious! A few more mounds to play with this year.
Tomatoes; huge volume of green fruit last year, but a badly timed rain ruined most of them before they could ripen, It was tragic. This year when they come out of the greenhouse, I will make sure they have a cover somehow.
Onions; something ate the baby onions from the inside out, I don't know what, but I am trying again this year with red onions and leeks.
Swiss chard; I mixed them with lettuces and spinach last year, and that didn't work well for harvesting (but it was a pretty plant combo to look at) this year the chard has it's own space. As for lettuce and spinach, I will be container gardening these delicate greens this year.
Winter squash; last year was a complete flop. Rotten before they were the size of oranges. I won't be trying again this year.
Radishes and beets; they grew fast and plentiful, but where very riddled with holes. At least the beet greens were nice. I tried from seed this year, but only a few are sprouted so far.... Ah well.
Broccoli; it did well with tiny heads, but I just harvested and more came back. Packed full of rich flavour I am trying from seed this year, so far very wimpy little sprouts.
NEW for ths year;
Cucumbers: staying in the greenhouse.
Peppers: for the greenhouse.
Kale: started in the greenhouse and put ou last week, so far so good.
Bok choi: started from seeds, but when I set them out in the garden they bolted to flower immediately!
Sunflowers: looking good, they will be a treat for the chickens.
Melons: some seeds from a grocery store fruit, we will see if I get anything from the little sprouts I planted last week.
Figs: 2 new trees... Hopefully they will get enough sun for fruit.
I hope these very much loved baby plants reach their full potential in my garden.... If they fail, it won't be from lack of love on my part. I am loving the gardening this year.
5.04.2014
Whoa is me
I'm feeling sad these days
- my no gluten, no sugar experiment hasn't transformed my body/energy levels
- still heavy, puffy and achy as often as not
- there never seems to be enough money to plan something outside of basic monthly stuff
- my father-in-law is not taking his heart condition seriously
- the house is always dirty... always, even right after vacuuming there are hair balls and grit bursting out of their hiding places.
- my grand plans for decluttering are derailed by stuff that I am powerless to get rid of.
- bills keep growing, but pay doesn't
- my small world isn't doing enough to preserve the big world
- my kids aren't doing well at school (quite poorly actually)
That's enough of that.
On the bright side
- I'm living in a calm, wealthy country
- lots of love in my life
- I have safe drinking water and food
- there is beauty all around
- my home is well appointed and comfortable
- I am employable
- no debt (other than the mortgage)
- I can read and have access to as much information as I could ever handle
- my garden is sprouting
so really my whoas are not that bad in the grand scheme of things... I just fell blasé right now.
3.25.2014
photo book
New photo book!
This one is of the home renovations started waaaay back in July 2012. Finally got around to the book making part!
This one is of the home renovations started waaaay back in July 2012. Finally got around to the book making part!
3.24.2014
Coming Alive
“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” -Howard Thurman
Thank you "Art of Simple" for this post and the above quote.
This weekend I was lucky enough to experience one of the things that I love MOST in the world. It's a simple activity that is in line with my personal values and totally free... a walk in the woods with my family.
In my area, there are loads of trails -- the land used to be a coal mining camp of some sort and is on the (now quiet) railway. The trees may not be first growth giants, but the woods are filled with forgotten relics, and mysterious holes and mounds. The local modern neighbours to these woods have built networks of trails for everything from walking dogs, jogging, ATVs and mountain bikes. It's technically private land, but undeveloped/left to go wild for the last hundred or so years. We are not discouraged from enjoying it.
That is the single feature that drew me to this particular neighbourhood and this particular house. It backs onto this vast network of trails that loop and twist all up and down the ridge, between wetlands, farmlands, suburbs and a highway. I can walk for hours and hours with no chance of getting lost, and always some exciting scenery from panoramic valley views to a beaver dam to deep mossy woods to rusty relics. It's a perfect hiking place to me, and it lifts my spirits like nothing else can to walk in the woods!
The kids throw sticks, and climb trees, the dog charges through the undergrowth and dives into the marsh, my husband and I quietly chat while we walk, and I am often taking pictures or collecting edible wilds along the way.
We bond.
We exercise.
We connect with nature.
We connect with the world immediately near our home.
On these walks we have seen a black bear, owl, swans, hawk, ducks (and other waterfowl), great blue herons, deer, woodpeckers, squirrel, bunnies, dozens of different varieties of songbirds, and massive evidence of the local beaver population and we've startled tiny rodents too. The flora is stunning anytime of year, and the wetland's ebb and flow with the rain is always fascinating to me. We are a part of nature, not separate, no matter how hard we try to disconnect from the dirt and the weather. I love that intimate reminder that the woods give me. I come home muddy and tired and really, truly happy to my core.
It beats watching TV for me any day.
But back to "Art of Simple"'s message. I may not be able to make money doing this activity that makes me come alive, but I recognize it for what it is. I savour each walk and let the experience fill me up with joy that carries through for days. I am so thankful for it.
What makes YOU come alive? Is it exciting or quiet? Is it alone or social? Is it flamboyant or internal?
(As a post script, I should mention, my wonderful walking trails are slated for development, the plans have been approved by the city already. It is just a matter of time before they are gone, and I will have to get my forest fix elsewhere. I will not cry. It hasn't happened yet.)
Thank you "Art of Simple" for this post and the above quote.
This weekend I was lucky enough to experience one of the things that I love MOST in the world. It's a simple activity that is in line with my personal values and totally free... a walk in the woods with my family.
In my area, there are loads of trails -- the land used to be a coal mining camp of some sort and is on the (now quiet) railway. The trees may not be first growth giants, but the woods are filled with forgotten relics, and mysterious holes and mounds. The local modern neighbours to these woods have built networks of trails for everything from walking dogs, jogging, ATVs and mountain bikes. It's technically private land, but undeveloped/left to go wild for the last hundred or so years. We are not discouraged from enjoying it.
We bond.
We exercise.
We connect with nature.
We connect with the world immediately near our home.
But back to "Art of Simple"'s message. I may not be able to make money doing this activity that makes me come alive, but I recognize it for what it is. I savour each walk and let the experience fill me up with joy that carries through for days. I am so thankful for it.
What makes YOU come alive? Is it exciting or quiet? Is it alone or social? Is it flamboyant or internal?
(As a post script, I should mention, my wonderful walking trails are slated for development, the plans have been approved by the city already. It is just a matter of time before they are gone, and I will have to get my forest fix elsewhere. I will not cry. It hasn't happened yet.)
3.08.2014
Sweet Tooth
When I was battling the cold from hell, I lost 6 pounds. Other than endless ab exercises from coughing and sneezing, I got ZERO exercise. And, I completely lost my sense of taste. As a result, my texture-only motivated meal choices were mostly raw vegetables, fruits and copious amounts of clear liquids. Dairy, bread and sugar had no appeal at all... apparently the smooth texture of chocolate is not possible with the cold since I couldn't suck it slowly (too stuffed up to suck at all).
That was good news from an otherwise miserable month. Healthy foods, lost weight.
However as soon as my sense of taste returned, so did the sugar cravings -- with a vengeance!
The weight came back as quickly as it was lost. boohoo for me.
Here is the takeaway from the experience:
SUGAR - all by itself - causes me about 6 pounds of excess weight.
I am not alone in this revelation. My husband has cut out sugar since January - only sugar - and has lost almost 10 pounds! No increase in exercise, no decrease in wheat products or anything else.
My darling friend Spider told me of her extraordinary health transformation more than a year ago after she gave up the sweet stuff, her results are lasting and truly incredible! I have to admit, though I respect and admire her life choice, I must not have TRULY believed it was for me, because I didn't embrace it for myself. Maybe I don't think I have the strength of will.... I am ridiculous about sweets, I crave them and ALWAYS have... sneaking baking chocolate to my room as a kid, eating more dessert than dinner at special occasions... Perhaps when faced with the idea of a change I talked myself into thinking I am different (after all isn't everyone's metabolisms slightly unique?).
Maybe the sugar has brainwashed me!
Today I stood naked in front of the mirror under the harsh bright bathroom lights and resolved not to eat ANY refined sugar product unless I was willing to eat it in front of a mirror. It's a bizarre idea, but not without precedence. That's why there are mirrors at safe injection sights, because facing yourself doing something destructive is very hard to do if you have any will to live. If it works for drug addicts, it should work for sugar addicts too, right?!
And I don't have to feel the panic that it is forbidden to me forever. If I follow the rules, I can eat sugar. But it will be inconvenient and ugly so I will likely leave it alone voluntarily.
It cannot be mindless consumption anymore. I deserve better than that, my kids deserve a happy, healthy mom and my husband deserves a wife that feels pretty.
The only reason I am sharing this publicly is because I want it to work.
***************
UPDATE: March 12, since posting this on the 8th, I have only twice gone to eat a treat, and I honoured my own rules and ate in front of a mirror. That really sucks to be honest. Inconvenient and unpleasant. There were other moments when I wanted a treat, but the idea of going through the hassle kept me from the sweet stuff. It's too early to tell if this will continue to work, but so far so good.
That was good news from an otherwise miserable month. Healthy foods, lost weight.
However as soon as my sense of taste returned, so did the sugar cravings -- with a vengeance!
The weight came back as quickly as it was lost. boohoo for me.
Here is the takeaway from the experience:
SUGAR - all by itself - causes me about 6 pounds of excess weight.
I am not alone in this revelation. My husband has cut out sugar since January - only sugar - and has lost almost 10 pounds! No increase in exercise, no decrease in wheat products or anything else.
My darling friend Spider told me of her extraordinary health transformation more than a year ago after she gave up the sweet stuff, her results are lasting and truly incredible! I have to admit, though I respect and admire her life choice, I must not have TRULY believed it was for me, because I didn't embrace it for myself. Maybe I don't think I have the strength of will.... I am ridiculous about sweets, I crave them and ALWAYS have... sneaking baking chocolate to my room as a kid, eating more dessert than dinner at special occasions... Perhaps when faced with the idea of a change I talked myself into thinking I am different (after all isn't everyone's metabolisms slightly unique?).
Maybe the sugar has brainwashed me!
Today I stood naked in front of the mirror under the harsh bright bathroom lights and resolved not to eat ANY refined sugar product unless I was willing to eat it in front of a mirror. It's a bizarre idea, but not without precedence. That's why there are mirrors at safe injection sights, because facing yourself doing something destructive is very hard to do if you have any will to live. If it works for drug addicts, it should work for sugar addicts too, right?!
And I don't have to feel the panic that it is forbidden to me forever. If I follow the rules, I can eat sugar. But it will be inconvenient and ugly so I will likely leave it alone voluntarily.
It cannot be mindless consumption anymore. I deserve better than that, my kids deserve a happy, healthy mom and my husband deserves a wife that feels pretty.
The only reason I am sharing this publicly is because I want it to work.
***************
UPDATE: March 12, since posting this on the 8th, I have only twice gone to eat a treat, and I honoured my own rules and ate in front of a mirror. That really sucks to be honest. Inconvenient and unpleasant. There were other moments when I wanted a treat, but the idea of going through the hassle kept me from the sweet stuff. It's too early to tell if this will continue to work, but so far so good.
3.01.2014
42
42 is the Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe and Everything.
(according to the brilliant writings of Douglas Adams)
Well, we'll see about that! Officially today that is my age.
I'm coming into it with a 2nd round of antibiotics to try to annihilate this endless sinus cold and extremely sore ribs, but otherwise I am positive it will be a good year !
(according to the brilliant writings of Douglas Adams)
Well, we'll see about that! Officially today that is my age.
I'm coming into it with a 2nd round of antibiotics to try to annihilate this endless sinus cold and extremely sore ribs, but otherwise I am positive it will be a good year !
1.29.2014
French Onion Soup
Have you ever had a great bowl of French Onion Soup?
I have, and every time I order it from a restaurant I hope that it will be that good.... usually I am sorely disappointed with some salty fake tasting powdered knock off.
This week I took matters into my own hands (and my own kitchen). With the research (internet) I soon discovered that it is a very time consuming prospect to do it right. A decent consommé stock takes nearly 2 days to make, and that's before it even starts to become onion soup!
First I bought some nice soup bones (beef and pork), roasted them in a hot oven for over an hour, then added various herbs, spices and vegetables and simmered in water for 18 hours (thank you slow cooker). Strained and skimmed and seasoned some more, it was finally good to use for whatever I want.
Next, I sautéed 3 thinly sliced, large, sweet onions with 5 cloves of garlic in a decent dose of butter until caramelized. Then added a glass of red wine to the onions and kept it simmering until the wine had evaporated. Added some salt and pepper and a bit of flour until clear, then finally 2 quarts of my home-made broth. And simmered to a rich, savoury perfection.
Thick sliced Italian bread topped with an organic Canadian Swiss grilled to bubbly under the broiler and put onto the steaming, deep bowls of soup.
Was it worth 2 days of time?
YES!
It was everything I dreamed a French Onion Soup should be.
(I would show you pictures but we ate it too quickly.)
I have, and every time I order it from a restaurant I hope that it will be that good.... usually I am sorely disappointed with some salty fake tasting powdered knock off.
This week I took matters into my own hands (and my own kitchen). With the research (internet) I soon discovered that it is a very time consuming prospect to do it right. A decent consommé stock takes nearly 2 days to make, and that's before it even starts to become onion soup!
First I bought some nice soup bones (beef and pork), roasted them in a hot oven for over an hour, then added various herbs, spices and vegetables and simmered in water for 18 hours (thank you slow cooker). Strained and skimmed and seasoned some more, it was finally good to use for whatever I want.
Next, I sautéed 3 thinly sliced, large, sweet onions with 5 cloves of garlic in a decent dose of butter until caramelized. Then added a glass of red wine to the onions and kept it simmering until the wine had evaporated. Added some salt and pepper and a bit of flour until clear, then finally 2 quarts of my home-made broth. And simmered to a rich, savoury perfection.
Thick sliced Italian bread topped with an organic Canadian Swiss grilled to bubbly under the broiler and put onto the steaming, deep bowls of soup.
Was it worth 2 days of time?
YES!
It was everything I dreamed a French Onion Soup should be.
(I would show you pictures but we ate it too quickly.)
"I love it when a plan comes together."
-John "Hannibal" Smith, A-Team
1.14.2014
vivid
I need some sleep.
I go to bed early enough, but I can't seem to get comfortable or the right temperature. Then I finally sleep and I have stupid, vivid dreams that wake me up in a state of agitation. Then the cycle starts all over again.
Apparently my teenage son is experiencing the same troubles. I wonder what it is?
I go to bed early enough, but I can't seem to get comfortable or the right temperature. Then I finally sleep and I have stupid, vivid dreams that wake me up in a state of agitation. Then the cycle starts all over again.
Apparently my teenage son is experiencing the same troubles. I wonder what it is?
1.11.2014
achy breaky abdomen
I had day surgery this week. Just an exploratory peek into my abdomen laprascopically. The incisions are tiny, but I guess they HAVE to use general anaesthetic for it. Going under stresses me out so badly. Complete lack of awareness while strangers are touching, poking, yanking… meanwhile all chatting about whatever they want while I lay prone and helpless. I HATE the thought of it. I wish they recorded audio of it all (like an airplane's black box) so I review it later… at least then I could get a sense of how it went.
This time I had the forethought to tell the anesthesiologist that I have a throat that catches on things (last time he tore my throat up quite badly forcing the tube in, but I didn't remind him of that specifically). So he showed me how he would use a small scope to help guide the tube this time (yay!) Sure enough, other than my throat feeling weirdly stretched and achy, no rips this time… so relieved. It felt terrible adding that recovery to the regular recovery last time.
It's cruel. Not allowed to eat a thing after midnight the night before the surgery. But of course I don't stay up to midnight, so I hadn't eaten a thing since about 8pm. Then I had clear black coffee, a bit of water and clear bouillon in the morning. I had to be at admitting by 2pm for a 3:30 surgery. Of course the surgeon was delayed so everything was delayed. I don't know when I finally got into the O.R., but it was definitely dark out. I was cozy in the cotton layers they had me waiting in. And I had a book. VERY hungry, but nervous enough that eating wasn't really something I wanted to do anyhow.
They drew some blood for a test before the operation (I don't know what for, but it passed the time).
Happily, the nurse that rolled me on the gurney to the O.R.'s hallway was nice and chatty. She asked me some questions in good humour and put me at ease. I overheard her as she went into the O.R. telling the other crew in there that "She will be easy. She's young and in good health."
As I waited (without my book) on the gurney, in the hall, for the surgeon to be available, I watched other techs and surgeons come and go from other O.R.s and I watched the crew of cleaning personnel come and go too. Our hospital has really stepped up their game with taking sanitation seriously. They had an appalling track record for infections for a while… but from what I saw laying there, it will be better now.
The WORST part is going from the cozy gurney to the narrow operating table, having my arms spread out with the sticky dots put on my chest and the tubes inserted into my arm… suddenly the reality is undeniable that I won't know what is going to happen to my body for who-knows-how-long and then I will be moved unconscious to another gurney and wheeled to a different part of the hospital to wake up - hopefully.
But I didn't have time to panic because I promptly fell asleep with the sound of a male nurse (another stranger) talking about bedbugs found in the Vancouver Library books …. nothing.
I woke up badly.
The other 2 times that I woke up from previous surgeries, it was a surreal experience of sleeping in one place and waking in another. I woke up groggy and more bewildered than uncomfortable. The discomfort came afterwards as shoulder pain, thrashed throat and abdominal aches.
This time I woke up crying and really sore. I had a little bit of shakes and moaned until the nurse noticed me. She was a really lovely caring young lady (Julie) who brought me a warm blanket. She could tell I was green around the gills and gave me some gravol, even though I said I'd probably be fine without it. She smiled and said I would be much more comfortable if I took it. And she was right. Before she got it to me I nearly hurled, and that sensation was enough to add insult to injury.
More tears and a terrible sense of something being wrong was pervasive in every cell of my body. Maybe they used some different sleepy juice on my this time?
My husband was already at the hospital when they called for him to pick me up. I had a prescription for T3 to be filled before I went home. And he rolled me out to the car and away we went. I was HUNGRY even though still a bit nauseated. So we stopped at a by-the-slice pizza joint downtown and I enjoyed 2 massive slices of the best pizza I have ever had… just what I wanted.
I think the T3s don't agree with me. I didn't sleep that night. I felt like my eyelids were spring loaded. I also felt like I was going to hurl every time I tried to lay down, so I propped myself up with pillows on the couch (quite comfy) and watched Netflix on my tablet. At one point I thought "wow, I've seen a lot of episodes, I wonder what time it is" and it was 3:56 am! Considering I am usually asleep by 9:30pm, this is ridiculous. I turned it off and tried to sleep, I may have got a bit, but at 5:30 I had to take some more pain management and drag my wobbly self to the bathroom.
I had supervision the whole next day. My wonderful husband took the day off to babysit. Again, I couldn't nap. But I was fine at laying still as much as possible. Queezy and sore and my voice was gone 60% of the time, but it could have been worse. Now a couple days after the fact I feel almost all the way better. No more T3s required since yesterday morning! I even slept last night!
The funny part of it all ; in recovery, the nurse gave me some papers. Recovery instructions and 3 sheets of photographs with notes on them. They were pictures of my guts!!!!!! The mysterious internal workings of ME. I love it! It's so tidy in there… smooth organs in various shades of pink, white and orangish. He drew lines to which organs were what (helpful) and wrote "healthy" on every one.
Isn't that cool? I have a portrait that I have never seen before.
This time I had the forethought to tell the anesthesiologist that I have a throat that catches on things (last time he tore my throat up quite badly forcing the tube in, but I didn't remind him of that specifically). So he showed me how he would use a small scope to help guide the tube this time (yay!) Sure enough, other than my throat feeling weirdly stretched and achy, no rips this time… so relieved. It felt terrible adding that recovery to the regular recovery last time.
It's cruel. Not allowed to eat a thing after midnight the night before the surgery. But of course I don't stay up to midnight, so I hadn't eaten a thing since about 8pm. Then I had clear black coffee, a bit of water and clear bouillon in the morning. I had to be at admitting by 2pm for a 3:30 surgery. Of course the surgeon was delayed so everything was delayed. I don't know when I finally got into the O.R., but it was definitely dark out. I was cozy in the cotton layers they had me waiting in. And I had a book. VERY hungry, but nervous enough that eating wasn't really something I wanted to do anyhow.
They drew some blood for a test before the operation (I don't know what for, but it passed the time).
Happily, the nurse that rolled me on the gurney to the O.R.'s hallway was nice and chatty. She asked me some questions in good humour and put me at ease. I overheard her as she went into the O.R. telling the other crew in there that "She will be easy. She's young and in good health."
As I waited (without my book) on the gurney, in the hall, for the surgeon to be available, I watched other techs and surgeons come and go from other O.R.s and I watched the crew of cleaning personnel come and go too. Our hospital has really stepped up their game with taking sanitation seriously. They had an appalling track record for infections for a while… but from what I saw laying there, it will be better now.
The WORST part is going from the cozy gurney to the narrow operating table, having my arms spread out with the sticky dots put on my chest and the tubes inserted into my arm… suddenly the reality is undeniable that I won't know what is going to happen to my body for who-knows-how-long and then I will be moved unconscious to another gurney and wheeled to a different part of the hospital to wake up - hopefully.
But I didn't have time to panic because I promptly fell asleep with the sound of a male nurse (another stranger) talking about bedbugs found in the Vancouver Library books …. nothing.
I woke up badly.
The other 2 times that I woke up from previous surgeries, it was a surreal experience of sleeping in one place and waking in another. I woke up groggy and more bewildered than uncomfortable. The discomfort came afterwards as shoulder pain, thrashed throat and abdominal aches.
This time I woke up crying and really sore. I had a little bit of shakes and moaned until the nurse noticed me. She was a really lovely caring young lady (Julie) who brought me a warm blanket. She could tell I was green around the gills and gave me some gravol, even though I said I'd probably be fine without it. She smiled and said I would be much more comfortable if I took it. And she was right. Before she got it to me I nearly hurled, and that sensation was enough to add insult to injury.
More tears and a terrible sense of something being wrong was pervasive in every cell of my body. Maybe they used some different sleepy juice on my this time?
My husband was already at the hospital when they called for him to pick me up. I had a prescription for T3 to be filled before I went home. And he rolled me out to the car and away we went. I was HUNGRY even though still a bit nauseated. So we stopped at a by-the-slice pizza joint downtown and I enjoyed 2 massive slices of the best pizza I have ever had… just what I wanted.
I think the T3s don't agree with me. I didn't sleep that night. I felt like my eyelids were spring loaded. I also felt like I was going to hurl every time I tried to lay down, so I propped myself up with pillows on the couch (quite comfy) and watched Netflix on my tablet. At one point I thought "wow, I've seen a lot of episodes, I wonder what time it is" and it was 3:56 am! Considering I am usually asleep by 9:30pm, this is ridiculous. I turned it off and tried to sleep, I may have got a bit, but at 5:30 I had to take some more pain management and drag my wobbly self to the bathroom.
I had supervision the whole next day. My wonderful husband took the day off to babysit. Again, I couldn't nap. But I was fine at laying still as much as possible. Queezy and sore and my voice was gone 60% of the time, but it could have been worse. Now a couple days after the fact I feel almost all the way better. No more T3s required since yesterday morning! I even slept last night!
The funny part of it all ; in recovery, the nurse gave me some papers. Recovery instructions and 3 sheets of photographs with notes on them. They were pictures of my guts!!!!!! The mysterious internal workings of ME. I love it! It's so tidy in there… smooth organs in various shades of pink, white and orangish. He drew lines to which organs were what (helpful) and wrote "healthy" on every one.
Isn't that cool? I have a portrait that I have never seen before.
1.02.2014
My boys ROCK!
It's ridiculous how much I am LOVING being my kids' mom these days!
Their humour is awesome and constant and their attitudes are pleasant.
(can you tell they are on Christmas break so there is no school tension?)
Their humour is awesome and constant and their attitudes are pleasant.
(can you tell they are on Christmas break so there is no school tension?)
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